Time for ABC World News Tonight! Can’t wait, I said, when I found myself stuck in the kitchen with wet hands, unable to change the channel after the local news.
So . . . tonight’s lead story(s): West Nile Virus has killed 27 of 320,000,000 people and we should therefore be very afraid (by the way, the number was 27 yesterday – no change). Also, salmonella outbreak! Even worse – 2 out of 320,000,000 dead-da-da-dead-dead.
I’m terrified. Thank you ABC News.